Obituary of Gabriel Gerard Williams

Thoughts and Wishes of a Dying Gab Friends and family, I'm afraid I might not have too much time left in this world and would like to share some thoughts and feelings before I'm unable to do so. First and foremost, the love and support I've received over the past year since the diagnosis has meant so much more to me than you can imagine. For the longest time I struggled with a constant storm of negative thoughts and feelings. I was depressed, unhappy, and disgusted with the person I was. I was crude, judgmental, severely lacked empathy, and said terrible things that I really regret. Sometime during the pandemic, something changed. Being alone with my thoughts, seeing the horrible situations others had to endure made me infinitely more thankful for the privileges I was blessed with and I didn't want to wallow in the swamp of depression anymore. And I tried, I really tried to be less judgmental and reactionary, more loving, more of the person I wanted to be so as to not waste more of the opportunities I was given. And I reached a catharsis. Midway into 2021 until late 2022 was the best I felt about myself, my relationships, and my actions. The opportunities for filming and photography that came my way gave me a newfound purpose that I missed so much. Sure my education had stalled, my plethora of health issues didn't seem to be getting any better, and I was broke as hell, but all of those negatives were nothing to me. I wasn't sedentary and was manifesting the positive change I so desperately wanted to reach. Every opportunity was a gift, no matter how small or insignificant it may have seemed. In early 2023, I finally got some answers to those health problems I was facing. After I coughed up a large amount of blood, some scans showed a significant amount of tumors in my chest. It scared the hell out of me and I will admit that I'm still very scared for what my future holds. But I was happy. So damn happy for finally having a clear head (despite the tumors) and a reason to love myself again. Despite the dour outlook I had, I knew things were going to be okay. Sure the situation I was handed really really sucked, but the light and joy in my life returned and I wasn't going to let it bring me down. My life was a gift. My hope is that everyone of you is able to find peace, love, and beauty in this world. I know it's hard. America is as divided as it ever was, innocent lives are being unceremoniously snuffed out and repressed in places like Palestine and the Congo, the rich are getting richer, the poor are getting poorer, the cost of living is skyrocketing, the beauty of the natural world is being destroyed because of the endless drive for wealth… And it doesn't seem like things are ever going to improve anytime soon. But despite all the doom and gloom, there's still beauty and hope. Beautiful people, beautiful minds, and a beautiful world that is a gift many of us unfortunately take for granted. I should know because that was me. Treat others with kindness, respect, and especially love. This world really needs a lot more of those things. Listen more. Every human life is a precious gift and has infinite potential to reshape the future into one worth living. You just have to give them a chance. Try and challenge any personal biases and prejudice you may have formed. Think more about the consequences of your actions because it's way too easy to get caught up in your own little world and to ignore the impact you have on others. Remember the other fellow. Try and walk more, advocate for less highway expansions and more public transit options. More trains! Trains are cool as hell! Take more walks around your towns and cities – really take time to look at the trees, the clouds, the plants, the flowers, the birds, the bugs (STOP SQUISHING BUGS AND SPIDERS, their lives are just as important as yours and mine). Every small and beautiful life you have the privilege of sharing the world with is a gift. Eat less meat, especially beef. Not none, but less. The world will thank you. Nuclear power is great! Don't be afraid of it! It's clean and green as hell and I don't want to hear any belly aching about Chernobyl, Fukushima, or Three Mile Island! Those were opportunities to learn, not to give up. Try to leave the world in a better state than you found it in. Pick up litter on those walks you'll be taking, carpool more, and drive as little as you can. Advocate, advocate, ADVOCATE! But more importantly, try your best and be the change you want to see. The ego of man is something that oftentimes gets in the way of any real and meaningful progress towards a world that is pleasant to live in. I mentioned not killing bugs because it's so easy to ignore the small things in life because of how much bigger and (arguably) smarter we are when compared to them. But we are just as insignificant as the humble worm digging through the soil. We are so unfathomably small in this seemingly ceaseless universe that we are no better, no wiser than said humble worm. And using our gift of knowledge to destroy those deemed lesser than the egotistical man is narcissistic and dumb. Have empathy for the small creatures we share this world with – it's unnecessarily cruel to oppress anything in this world just because you can. And if you start small, it's easy to extend that sympathy to your fellow man and to coexist in a world without egos. Try. It's all too easy to lose sight of where you want things to go and the path it'll take to get there. Failure is extremely discouraging, and giving up in order to avoid future failures, is all too sexy and alluring. But failure makes you strong; it provides insight, and perspective on how to reach said goals. Try and keep trying the best you can. You're allowed to feel discouraged but don't let those feelings rule over you. Tomorrow is a new day and so is the day after. You're strong, you've got this! Be more tolerant and understanding with those who are different from you. When I was younger and way more ignorant, I found it way too easy to demonize and chastise those who were different than I was. I heard negative talking points about the LGBTQ+ community and thought a lot of those making brave and bold choices in their lives were misled or mentally unwell. But it wasn't them, it was me. I was mentally unwell. These people deserve to be propped up and celebrated for their bravery to be who they want to be. It's got nothing to do with wokeness or any of that crap detractors try to shove down the ears and throats of the masses. It's about making the world a safer and more pleasant place to live for everyone because that's what everyone deserves. Choose happiness and peace of mind, instead of bleakness and isolation. Choose love instead of hate. Treat life as the gift that it is, and share that gift with the world. A memorial service will be held for Gabriel on Saturday, June 1st at 10AM at the Crosswicks Friends Meeting, 15 Front St, Crosswicks, NJ 08515.